I will shortly close this blog and concentrate on my music fandom blog. I may open a new blog sometime in the future. I’m not sure yet.

For now, it will be easier for me to concentrate on one blog.

Something is coming.

No, that’s not right.

Something is HERE!

What is it, you might ask?

I’ve created a Taiyo & Ciscomoon fansite! Yes. It is here:

http://www.taiyoandciscomoon.com/

For now, there is only a forum, but I hope to add more goodies in the future. The default language is Japanese, but I have included instructions to register and switch the forum to English. My hope is to attract Japanese and English-speaking fans. Will I succeed? I hope so!

This is a good way to begin the 2009 year, yes?

Love&Peace

Tags: Taiyo & Ciscomoon

As some of you know, this year had its good times and its bad times for me.

Earlier this afternoon, I finally received my MEGA Best CDs. I had ordered the CDs for Taiyo & Ciscomoon, Melon Kinenbi, Yuko Nakazawa, and Natsumi Abe, plus Natsumi’s “Screen” single. The arrival of these CDs cheered me up very much. After all the bad times of this year, I needed a good cheer. This is the perfect way to end a year, and the perfect way to start a new one.

Naturally, I opened the Taiyo & Ciscomoon CD first. I was most looking forward to this CD and “MEGA MELON”.

The members of Taiyo & Ciscomoon and Melon Kinenbi will probably never read this, but I want to thank both groups for adding brightness to my life. I love all of you.

I will cherish these CDs forever.<3

Love&Peace

Tags: Atsuko Inaba, Melon Kinenbi, Taiyo & Ciscomoon, 稲葉貴子

After listening to various Younha songs on Youtube, I’m in love with this song. Very much. She has a beautiful voice.

I must get her debut Korean album, which includes this song. As a bonus, it comes with a miniphotobook.<3

Love&Peace

A few minutes ago, I discovered a new Korean musician: Younha

I’m liking her vocals, and the music so far. I definitely should check out more of her music.

Plus, she’s cute. Maybe a potential crush too.;)

(Looking up her Wiki info, she also performs in Japan.)

Love&Peace

This is the first year that I’m not looking forward to Christmas. It’s not easy for me to say the reason. I guess the best way for me to say it is I miss my adopted parents very much. I lost one last year, and one earlier this year. I never talked about it because it’s difficult. It’s difficult to talk about it now. I’m not very good at talking about personal things.

Much of my silliness and joking lately have been a mask to hide my sadness. But lately my true feelings have been breaking through the mask. I’m sure it’s been obvious to many of you that something has been wrong.

These past three years have not been good for me. First, around the beginning of 2005 when I began realizing that I was attracted to women, and many online friends stopped speaking to me. Then later, when I had knee trouble, which prevented me from my daily runs. (Although my knee hasn’t caused much trouble lately, I continue to worry about it and haven’t resumed my running.) Those two events began my downward spiral into depression.

Fortunately, my parents accepted me when they learned about my orientation. They have always accepted me despite my weirdness.

And I continue to have difficulty allowing anyone to get too close to me. Some of you I’ve known for several years, but I still keep you at a distance. I am sorry for that, but that’s the way I am. Maybe I am a bad person. Maybe that is why so many bad things happen to me. I don’t know.

I’m sure some of you are worried. But there’s one thing I know. No matter how depressed I am feeling or have felt, there is one option I’d never consider. I still want to be alive. I don’t know why, but there is something inside me that wants me to stay alive. I don’t know how to describe it.

Sorry for this pointless post. I’m sure most of it made no sense.

Well, the Mega Best CDs and my Natsumi Abe “Screen” single are being shipped. But since I ordered through YesAsia, it will probably take a couple of weeks before they arrive. Will I survive? I want them now! *laugh*

Please, Mr. Postman, hurry up and bring them quickly. I will give you a cookie if you do.

Love&Peace

The latest two episodes of Sarah Jane Adventures made me think. In those two episodes, Sarah Jane has the opportunity to travel to the past to meet her parents, who left her when she was a baby. All her life, she wondered why her parents would do such a thing.

If I had the opportunity, I would wish to travel to the past for the same reason. I would want to know why my parents abandoned me when I was born. Was I not wanted? Did they not love me? Why did they leave me? Those questions I have always wondered.

Even now, it’s difficult for me to express my thoughts and feelings about it to others. Perhaps my birth parents’ action is partly why I feel insecure lately when friends leave me.

But would it really be good to know the answers? I’m not sure, but I will always wonder.

Imagine my surprise and shock when I discovered Atsuko is currently in New York. She is there training for dancing and singing. She is already an amazing singer and dancer, so I believe she will be even more awesome after her training. I hope she doesn’t work too hard and hurt herself. But I hope she does her best. I believe in her. (*^-^*)

Already there have been people asking me if I’d go to New York to see her. The answer is no. I’m sure that will shock many people. （笑）True, I make jokes about going to meet her, but in reality, she does not need fans like me becoming crazy and distracting her from her work and training.

Even if she was in the same town as me, I would not follow her around or try to meet her. If we met accidently, I would probably smile in greeting, but that’s it. I am content with admiring her from a distance. It’s like the scene from “Morning Cop”, where the guy says, “Idols should be admired from a distance.”

If her training leads to a singing career, and she performs a concert in America, I will definitely try my best to find a way to attend a concert. Or, if she performed a concert while I visit Japan, I will definitely attend.

I hope she does decide to become a singer. She is very talented, and I believe she can be very successful. I would definitely buy all of her music, and any other merchandise related to her. But whatever she decides to do, I will support her in every way possible.

がんばってください稲葉さん。(*^-^*)

Love&Peace

Tags: Atsuko Inaba, 稲葉貴子

I woke up from my newest Hello! Project dream a few minutes ago. This time, Ayumi Shibata (柴田あゆみ) was in the dream. She and I were talking, and someone else was there with us. She was using limited English in the conversation. The main part of the conversation I remember is that I was telling her that her song “Drive” is my current favorite solo track from the “Melon Juice” album.

It’s true, too. Lately, whenever that song starts playing on my iPod, I enjoy it. It’s a beautiful song. (*^-^*)

Love&Peace